A: Did you hear about the ball player?

B: The home run hitter on drugs?

A: He said a doctor helped him with a personal problem.

B: He said he wasn’t using drugs.

A: He apologized to the fans.

B: The league suspended him for 50 games.

A: That will cost him some money.

B: Yes, about $7 million.

A: That will teach him a good lesson.

B: He probably won’t use drugs anymore.

A: But it won’t stop other players from using drugs.

B: No. Everyone always figures that they won’t get caught.

B: What’s so hard about hitting a little white ball?

A: It’s hard if you want to do it right.

B: You mean like Tiger?

A: No, like a good amateur golfer.

B: What’s so hard about golf?

A: There are so many things you have to do right.

B: Like what?

A: Like keep your left arm straight, keep your head down, and follow through.

B: Yikes! Who can remember all that?

A: You need to get a lot of lessons when you’re really young.

B: Forget it. Golf sounds more like work than fun.

B: Is there a game tonight?

A: Yes, it starts at 7 p.m.

B: Can we get tickets?

A: Yes, but only the cheap tickets.

B: How much are they?

A: They’re only $5 each.

B: That’s a good price.

A: Yes, it’s cheaper than a hot dog or a beer.

B: Where are the seats?

A: They’re behind the outfield.

B: Maybe we can catch a home run ball.

B: No, please tell me.

A: Someone punched out someone.

B: That’s not nice.

A: It’s worse than that.

B: How so?

A: Two guys got into an argument.

B: I’ll bet they were drinking.

A: A third guy punched one of the two guys.

B: I’ll bet he was drinking, too.

A: The victim hit his head on the concrete steps and died.

B: That’s terrible. Can’t people just have fun at a baseball game?

B: There are so many great players.

A: Yes, but who is the greatest?

B: I’d have to say Babe Ruth.

A: Most people would say that.

B: He changed the game.

A: Yes, he made the home run popular.

B: Everybody loved him, all over the nation.

A: He helped make the Yankees the best team ever.

B: And Ruth was a good person, too.

A: He always visited hospitals to cheer up sick kids.

B: There will never be another Babe.

B: The one that Tiger won?

A: How did he do it?

B: It was nothing for him.

A: He sank a 20-foot putt on the last hole to win by one stroke!

B: He sank a 25-footer last year at the same tournament to win by one stroke.

A: I think he is from outer space.

B: No human could possibly play golf that well.

A: Whenever he needs a shot to win a tournament, he makes that shot.

B: No human can do that.

A: Somebody should check his birth record.

B: I bet it says he was born on Mars.

B: You can say that again.

A: But I’m worried about Tiger.

B: Why is that?

A: Because he likes to SCUBA dive.

B: What’s wrong with that?

A: It can be dangerous.

B: You mean he could drown.

A: He shouldn’t SCUBA dive until he retires.

B: But he dives to relax.

A: He might relax, but it makes me nervous.

B: If his wife doesn’t mind, you shouldn’t mind.

B: That’s a good idea.

A: I bought some new shoes.

B: Are they comfortable?

A: They’re very comfortable.

B: How much were they?

A: They were on sale for $80.

B: Do they help you run faster?

A: No, but my feet don’t hurt anymore.

B: Then they’re worth every penny.

A: You might want to buy a pair.

B: I’ll wait until I wear this pair out.

B: I like to hit the ball.

A: I like to run around the bases.

B: I like to slide into the bases.

A: Yeah. It’s a lot of fun to slide.

B: I want to be a baseball player when I grow up.

A: Me too. I want to play for the Yankees.

B: Not me. I want to play for the Dodgers.

A: We have to practice every day.

B: I don’t like practice.

A: Me neither. It’s boring.

B: But practice makes perfect.

B: Yes. That’s a good idea.

A: Where do you want to go?

B: We can go to the river.

A: Or we can go to the lake.

B: Or we can go to the ocean.

A: Let’s go to the lake.

B: Yes. The lake is only 10 miles away.

A: We can be there in 20 minutes.

B: I’ll get our fishing rods.

A: I’ll get the bait.

B: We’ll have fresh fish for dinner!